Latest photo(s)

Natasha Kang & me ;the photo that i helped Sharon & Natasha Kang take during the Superteens break. ;You see the guy in the middle os SK & NK is the Superteens people & he is a very funny guy. I was laughing non stop when he was having his talks.

Today, indeed i might be a Lunatic in class. My mind was totally empty & i was laughing just for nothing. I want to apologize to Singapore as i didn't know that "Singapore is a multi-racial country. =x Sorry. Slacking throughout the lessons today. I was very surprise that my class, 5/2 today so hardworking. Everyone was doing their work during Chem & Maths lessons today. As Mdm Nurul did not come to school as she has the attend some courses. We were being schedule of what to do the next day when Mdm Nurul will not be around for these 3days. Natasha Kang & I was gossiping of our Ex target & our Husband that we were planning to win him. =)) Simply loves you sitting beside me & have so much things to say.




&& Today, i realised something. There's a person who asked people who always hang around with me & seems to be trying to concern me. I don't know whether you are truly concerning me or you just want to know about my life. If you do really concern me, i shall say that a very "Thanks You" to you & i'm so glad to have a friend like you around. If you are just wanted to know anything about my life, you can just ask me directly & i will tell you. There's a no need to be asking around as i am Fine with it. People might think that i am a very pathetic girl as i have to work just to pay for my phone bills & is such a wasting money for it.

Firstly, i wanted to say that i work not just to pay for my phone bills & also the wishes that i wanted to fulfill. Since small, i have been taking $$ from my parents & didn't know the hardships of earning $$. Ever since i worked, i knew the hardships of earning $$ & that's why i didn't ask much money from my parents anymore. Secondly, I have quitted my jobs & my parents are helping me to pay my $500 phone bills by monthly installment & also i promised them after "O" Level, found a job and pay them back. Thirdly, i am not a pathetic person but a more sensible & a thoughtful person not like some people who still have a childish thinkings in such an older age.



& currently now, i don't wish to have any boyfriend now. As ever since i was with JianAn, i started to know some knowledge. Not everything you have to listen it means that you have understand clearly but actually you have to see it in your own eyes & experience it. He seems to be have some magical powers to wake me up.

In the past, i only know how to emo, hates a person, backstabber, an idiot person. But now i wanted to say Sorry to those people i have ever hate it or say your bad words at your back.

Now, as i said i am no longer what i am used to be in the past. I have changed but still a joker or rather say a crazy girl. I have changed in to a person that some people might can't even expected that i have changed. I no longer a backstabber, hate people or be an idiot person. As for emo, still will have it but much more better than before. Emoing when mood swings, stress about something, when i can't get things to be done.

I think i shall have a great Thanks to JianAn who makes me realise so much things. From now, i gonna to do what i wanted to do ever since long ago. By the time, all the things are done, it might be the time i might considering of having a boyfriend.& i hope my Future Boyfriend is gonna to be a very faithful ones to me & as well i won't take it for granted but to cherish it like a treasure to me. It might takes 8months to complete it but i hope can be less than that. =))

It has been sometime ever since the last time i went out shopping with Viviann. There's people asking me out for slack or whatever thingy. But i'm Sorry to say that i rejected you people. I do miss you all but i wanted to stay at home and rest well. As I'm not feeling well recently due to my breathing difficulty. There seems to have a blockage at my breathing tube. & also i want to take this chance to do what i want to let it done as soon as possible since i have quitted my job. I shall treat it as a long term break before is time for me to go back to work.

I remembered that i have promised a person to sleep early, not to harm myself anymore, get fatter, study well. I want to fulfill his promises before he come out. Although it has already over between us, the promises no longer exist. But i still want to do it just for his sake or rather say that is for my own sake. This blog will not be removed or relinked till he comes out. So that he still can find me even if he lost all contacts. I really do miss him alot.

No matter how hard of these promises gonna to be fulfill, i will still hold on to it even till the last minute that i might be holding my breathe.( Touch Wood)Hope that the readers can support me throughout this journey. I want to achieve something for myself so that i will never think that i am useless anymore. I am a winner as what Ernest said. We are the winner throughout Billions of sperm that we fought through inside our Mummy's tummy. I will continue on no matter what is gonna to be happen to me. =))

p/s: i miss every bits of all my beloved friends.

The ever first time in 2008 i broke my own records of not attending to school for so many times. I skipped 3days & attended 2days of school for this whole week. I asked myself "What am i doing?" I keep on tell myself that i have to study the next whole afternoon till night. Off my phone & totally concentrate in my studies. There's a phrase that people would say "Saying is a very easy task to do but when you want to DO IT, you will find it hard." & Indeed it is true.

I can't stop myself from holding a phone at my hand
I can't stop myself from moving the mouse browsing through here & there on nets.
I can't stop myself from sleeping like a pig.
I can't stop myself from eating & drinking.
I can't stop myself from the temptation of smoking.
I can't stop myself from watching television.
I can't stop myself from thinking of other things.
I can't stop myself from giving excuses of not to study.

How i ever wish a typical slap on to my face ,let me wake up from my dreams. "O" Level can say is still long but as the day goes by, you will feel that it is getting nearer. & by the time you want to revise through all the topics you might find it hard to catch up. Especially when you were trying to revise through your worst subject of all. You will say that it has no time for trying hard to understand it well. I always have the urge to shout it out loud at somewhere so to hope that i can feel better. Instead of shout it out, i talk in a very loud voice with other people to replace the shouting. I don't know what to do, is really totally out of my minds.

Can anyone do tell me what am i suppose to do so that i can have everything out of my Freaking Mind & Fully concentrating on my own studies without any disturbance from anyone. I am getting to hate myself more when i keep delaying time.

I hate myself of pick up smoking & slitting.
I hate myself of giving stupid excuses to myself.
I hate myself of unable to stop from using my laptop.
I hate myself of using handphone non stop.
I hate myself of sleeping so much.

Just simply a "HATE" can make me so vex about it. From a Non-an Addicted Smoker to become an Addicted Smoker. In my heart, i know there's a lot people don't wish that i picked up smoking. But a disappointment, i fail to do the simple task & picked up the things that you all hated the most which is smoking. I'm sorry but truly to say that smoking make me feel better. You all can say that there's other method that makes me feel better than picking smoking. I could say that i am totally out of any ideas of making myself feels better. I want to find if yoga could help me to relax my mind but i don't know where to find a course for yoga lesson. It is really the time for me to buck up but i did nothing to it. I am totally a Loser to myself.



You can lose to anyone out there but you can't lose to yourself. Losing to yourself is equal to lose everything even if you have everything. I have entirely lose everything as well as myself.

Recently really no much time for blogging. So i have never update for these few days.

Monday ;24March2008 ,Tuesday ;25March2008 ,Wednesday ;26March2008

Our school organise a programme called SUPERTEENS.It is to aspire us for our "O" Level.But i only went for Tuesday =x. The course is really very funny luh & made everyone cry their hearts out. Just like me i cried till my eyes now swollen. I cried too on Tuesday, crying out all my unhappy things or rather say the things tat have been bothering me so much. I cried it all once out, now my heart ;my mind can say is really a peace now. Thanks Sharon for consoling me when i was crying until so JIALAT. I started a new fresh life of me. I am dead & reborn, no longer what i am in the past but a more cheerful person. Superteens taught something & i feel like sharing @ here.

You're your thought.
Everything is created Twice.
First is in the mind
You are living the Life.
You created in the Past.
You creating the Life that you will live tomorrow.

I do agree with all this phrases. Decisions that we made are created by our thoughts. We can't say that if time goes back, how i wish that it never happens/ never have that decision before. Even if the times goes back, our mind ,our thoughts will still say the same things. Decisions are still there unchanged why not face the music. Don't regret the decision that is made just make it that you have learn a lesson & carry on with your Life. Find a dream/a goal to achieve it. =))

Wednesday ;26March2008 ,Thursday ;27March2008

Went to meet up JunYu & with his friend slacking & smoking as well. My favourite Viceroy Menthol Super Light, i Love the cool feeling inside my throat. x33 But don't worry my dear friends. I will quit it when i think is time for me to quit. As you know luh, quiting a thing needs time not just a minute/a day can change. I saw my Nicolas DIDI,it has been so long ever i see him.I Miss him damn much. Still as cute & handsome as the past luh. =)) I shall stop here luh. Wish me good luck for my "O" LeveL as i going to chiong & might not be meeting up much people. Sorry for it & is a real Promise that i will come out to meet up you guys after my "O".

21MARCH2008

Meet up with my BELOVED Viviann @ around 6pm. Supposedly to meet up @ 4pm. But i was too lazy to get myself to be dressed up nicely. After i have done all my stuffs, i rang up to Viviann's Number but no answer from her. So i called her house number see if she would pick up the phone. I thought is Viviann answered the phone, however is her mother who picks up the phone. She said that Viviann is sleeping now. I was like OH MY FUCKING GOD!!! Fall asleep while waiting for me. =.='' But it was my fault anyway, is my laziness cause her to fell asleep. Ikept on call her, flooding her phone like "Crazy Mad Woman". =x As i was calling her, i took my Father's phone & Cam whoring myself in my own Personal Room.

here's the picture below. =))
Viviann commented that my dressing was so LadyLike on that day.
Which doesn't look like me at all.
But i wanted to change my style soon. =))
I want to be a Lady not a Girl.
&& soon i going to say Goodbye to my "Stylish" Hair.
As i going to cut it short & straighten it.

Finally, she woke up in the end & we decided to meet up. We took MRT Train to Lavender & cabbed down to Arab Street 89 where Viviann wanted to buy her crystal over there. On the way to there, the Taxi Driver was very funny luh. He told us that @ this timing the shop over there has already close. Due to our STUBBORN, we wanted to see it in our own eyes, if not we won't change our destination. &yet, the uncle was right. The shop has closed, so we went to Bugis & dropped down. We went to "SASA" first to see something & i bought a spray container & a Sponge Puff for my Maybelline Foundation as the Sponge is like already very brownish, so i decided to change it. Then we went to Bubble Tea shop to have our dinner over there. I was busying doing my stuff while ordering our foods. After eating, we went to walk around @ Bugis Street.

Looking around @ all those clothings, suddenly have an urge of buying it but i am a beggar now. Can only see but can't buy anything. I feel like going to find a job to work for money & buy the things that i wants. But this year is a critical year, it is going to determine my future. So is rather than i work real hard for my studies or work real hard to earn money to buy the things that i want. It makes sense that Future is much more important than the things i want now. After my "O" level ended, i can go work & buy the things that i want & of course go Taiwan with Viviann but is still not confirm if going or not. As i must have my Parents approval, & i am a Girl. Most family worried more of their daughter than their son. "Son" will hardly get advantage my others but "Daughter" does. So they have to think twice before letting me go. But pray hard for the permission to be accept.



Let's not continue say about that. I went to bought some Hair clips too as i lost all my Cute Hair Clips. & as we were @ Bugis street, Viviann and I bought a T-shirt @ $20. Actually i don't want to buy but it would be much more cheaper if we together buy. As one for #12 Two for $20. So i bought a Mickey Mouse T-shirt & Viviann bought a Elmo T-shirt. We even decided to wear the shirt that we bought and wear it together the next day we meet up. We went to Downtown East play pool awhile, slack awhile & cabbed home & sleep.

22MARCH2008

Meet up Viviann again @ 4pm. We went to Downtown East to check up the Interview @ Cathay. But we didn't went for it as we were very shy. So we cabbed down to Arab Street 89 to buy the things before they closed @ 5pm. The Taxi Driver again a funny guy, & most idiot is that he said that i looked like age 14 or 15. arggghhhhhhhh!!!!! A lot people do say so luhh so i didn't really care much. =)) After bought the crystal that Viviann wants, we were stuck @ there as it was raining cats and dogs. We kept on wave our hands hoping for a cab. But none of a Taxi stopped when even there's no customer in their cab. After awhile, got some gentlemen helped us so we got a cab & headed down to bugis and took train to Ang Mo Kio. Along the way, my head was very pain & my body was quite hot. I think i was having a fever but i didn't really care much as my fever would always come & gone. We went to "Nebo" to have our dinner & played some games @ the arcade and went down to "FUNLAND" play pool as there is bigger & not much people over there than "KPOOL". We played for 3 hours. As we were playing, there's an Uncle kept on look at us playing. && an idiot boy who laughs at me when i did not hit in the ball which was so easy to be shooted in, wanted to challenge us POOL. The winner played with him One on One. I requested to Viviann that i want to play with him as i was not happy of that fellow. & Viviann was tired so she asked me to play. Afterall, i won that guy. At first i thought i might lose but in the end i use my skills & won him. =)) After that we went to take bus 88 to Pasir Ris, walked to Downtown slacked @ Mac & chatted with my ex colleagues. All missed me luhh, miss my laugher, my jokes & my craziness luhh. ^^ Soon we went home.

thanks my NATASHA DARLING for your phone's camera.

Sorry luh. My phone the camera SUCKS nehhs.

Miss the time we went to party world.

Thanks for cheering me up & concerning me so much.

I will be fine soon =))

Stupid Rafiq idea of taking pic. =.=''

Abit Ugly luhh.

Rafiq ,Me ,Hassan.

Extras come to 5/2 classroom always.

As our class i only at the 1st floor

In School Uniform of me.

So ugly ,like a nerdy.

Hate wearing SCHOOL UNIFORM.

Latest Photo(s) updated

Sorry due to some photos never uploaded in here.

I delete the previous post & remake new one at here

CAM-WHORE before we went to PARTY WORLD =))

5years of schoolmates together

United as ONE ;5/1 &5/2

Exists of ShiYi, LayPeng, Anna, Cecilia, Debbie, Yuwen, Natasha.

Husband(s) & Wife(s)

Darling ,Wifey ,Darling+Husband

ME ,LayPeng & Anna

Laogong & Laopuo always LOVE to be tgt. xD

3years of DARLING ;ShiYi(Me) &Natasha Kang

Simply Love the way you are x))

ME & Yu Wen

See the mirror reflection?? Cecilia.

Took a Candid Pic of Me & TAN LAY PENG

Someone took a Candid shot,

while i was talking to Botak & Cher Yang,

But my face was being Covered by LayPeng

&& YuWen was talking on phone =x (obviously )

Debbie took the Candid Shot of

ME, Natasha, Yuwen, Cecilia & Laypeng

while we were talking after eating Long John Silver

3words ;13 letters ;one simple meaning =))

BORED TO DEATH

Recently, i am just busy with my stuffs. Same routines everyday as usual. Like Schooling ,Went out to look for my Stuffs ,Studying ,Eating & Sleeping. But most of my time is for SLEEPING. xP Sorry, i'm really a pig. I can sleep from 7pm to 6:30am & went school, sleep in class again. =x && Hassan today commented me that "You have been sleeping everyday in class ever since Secondary 1, when can i stop my Bad Habits of sleeping. =.='' " wahahahas =x Although i slept in class, but i know what is teacher teaching about ok?? Only for some lessons i never sleep, like POA, Chemistry, Maths, Physics. The teacher too fierce to sleep le /rather say that the teacher too good that's why i don't want to sleep in their lessons. But for Physics is being forced not to sleep. =.='' As the Mr Yap lesson(Physics) real damn bored & i will always feel like sleeping due to hi monotony(should be correct spelling =x) voice. Maybe i shall blog less le. I have to STUDY STUDY STUDY!!!! O Level is like getting nearer & nearer as each day goes by. I shall stop here. Bye. Take care alrights =))

TODAY TODAY TODAY

17MARCH 2008 =))

You will see the BIG BIG BIG difference xP

HEY yea! =))
here yooos go, my answer.
VIVIANN xD ;You're all ever i wanted
You are wanted by me. ROARS!

SHOULD I / SHOULD NOT??
Can you tell me that should i let go of you or should i continue to wait for you?? I want to hear what your heart says. Do you still love me??or You have no more feelings to me anymore?? Do we still stand a chance of back together like in the past?? or Our game has already ended ever since the day we leave each other?? Can i really know the truth mahs?? I don't want to hear a "Don't Know" from you. I want a truly answer either "Yes" or "No". That's all & i will know what to do.

ai qing jiu xiang shi yi change dou niu qiu sai.

jing ran yi jing shang chang le, jiu yao da chu yi duan zui piao liang de qiu sai.

mei yi li jiu xiang shi ni zai xuan ze zi ji de ren sheng.

gai bu gai tou jing jiu yao kan ni zi ji dao di yao bu yao.

gai zhe mer tou jing jiu yao kan zi ji zuo chu zhe yang de xuan ze chu lai.

jing ran xuan ze tou jing mei yi ke qiu, jiu bu yao zai shi jian hai mei ting xia lai de na yi ke fang qi.

jin ran yao da, jiu yao jin quan li de qu da, da chu yi ge piao liang de chen ji chu lai.

dan zai zui hou de na yi fen zhong jiu de yao quan li yi fu, bu yao you ren he de yi han.

zhi yao quan li yi fu da wan zhe chang qiu sai jiu bu yao hou hui.

zhi shao ni cheng jing wei le zi ji de ai qin nu li guo.

lan qiu zhi shen Jordan cheng jing suo guo.

wo ke yi jie shou shi bai, dan she wo jue dui bu neng jie shou fang qi.

jiu xiang shi wo dui ni de gan jue, chong wo ren shi ni de na yi tian kai shi.

wo jiu yi jing bie wu xuan ze de, can jia le zhe yi dui ye de ai qing dou niu sai.

zai dui fang hai mei you jing zui hou yi ke qiu zhi qian, wo dou bu hui shi xin.

bu guan shi dou ni hai shi ren hai shi lian ai, wo dou hui quan li yi fu.

jiu suan ni gei wo quan shi jie zui yan mi de fang shou, wo yao hui xiang ban fa zhao dao ni de pa zhan.

tu po ni, chao xi ni, ran hou chao yue ni.

yin wei xi huan ni suo yi de fen.

he shui chong lai jiu bu hui ni liu, wo dui ni de gan jue ye bu hui hui tou.

wo bu xiang ba wo de sheng ming rang shang tian an pai, wo yao zi ji zhang wo zi ji de ren sheng.

sheng ming shi shu yu wo e, wo you wo de quan li an pai wo de ren sheng.

ru guo shi jian dao liu, wo hai shi hi zuo tong yi yang de jue ding, bu gu yi qie de xuan ze ni.

wo bu guan bie ren zhe mer shuo, wo wei yi zhi dao de shi wo dui ni de gan jue.

yin wei ai ni, suo yi hai pa shi qu ni

yin wei ai ni, xi wang wo shuo zuo de jue ding dou hui dai gei ni hao chu.

yin wei ai ni, geng hai pa bie ren qiang zhou ni.

yin wei ai ni, zhi xiang yao kan dao ni kuai le.

yin wei ai ni, wo bu gu yi qie de qu bao hu ni.

yin wei ai ni, bu hai pa dang chang shuo wo ai ni.

yin wei ai ni, li kai ni shi, xin hao tong.

Everyone thought i am alrights, but actually they are totally wrong. The Deep Pains in my heart is still there unchanged. I am just using a Fake Smile to cover up the Pains. I tried all methods not to think of anything, not to cry out. Indeed, i made it but my heart feels more and more uncomfortable as the day goes by bits by bits. Sometimes, i wished to Cry Out as Loud as Possible using my heart. Yet, i cried out of just watching a Touching Show. =.=''

Can anyone tell me what should i do???

I meet up BABY^^. So long never see him le. =)) I waited for him to off work @ Tanjong Pagar. The Underground tunnel from MRT was very eerie as i was walking alone at the path. I went to call Viviann Sister & accompany me taking.We talked alot on the phone till my BABY come. We took the last train to Jurong East & last train to Woodlands. We went to 7 ELEVEN buy somethings & we went to find place to slack for a while before we go back to BABY's house. On the way, BABY suddenly told me that his face very hot. Indeed, it was very hot when i touched it. & BABY having high fever le. Wanted to ask BABY to faster go home eat Panadol but BABY no much strength to walk. So we sit down at a garden near his house awhile dhen we headed to BABY's house. Before that, i gave BABY a keychain that i made for him. He keep on insisted want to open it & see what is the paper inside is writing about but i insisted say cannot open as i already put some pray inside le. Everything is nicely done. =)) At BABY's house, we slack awhile after that we fall asleep le. BABY sleep until very soundly but i never really sleep as i worried about BABY as he was sick. Finally, at night his temperature went down. I feel much more relieved & fall asleep too. Morning, i woke up & touched his body to check whether is still hot. I was so shocked that BABY body is so FUCKING HOT again. Then i faster go find water and panadol gave him eat. Funny is that we both took the wrong panadol. =.='' Until his mother found it dhen we realised it. No wonder his temperature never went down. BABY open the show Alvin & the chipmunks to watch. The show was funny & cute man. After watching, Baby already fall asleep halfway through the movie. && i went to take a bath as i cannot tolerate my hair got so many wax and spray thingy. After that, we went to 300+ to eat. && we went to a void deck slack awhile && i went home. I lost DOLLYvikii's Ring =((. i think i left it at the void deck. hais.. && that's the end of the day with BABY . =))

You're the one that i LOVE the most.

I don't wish that anythings happen to you.

I use my most sincere heart to help you pray.

Hope everything will go fine & smooth.

I am willing to give up some of my time to live in this world,

& give you all the blessings & lucks.

Recounting days of together is enough for me.

No matter how hard this Love journey gonna to be.

I also want to continue on the days with you.

As i told myself before, it is time that i make some effort in relationships.

& as i say it before, true love is not easy to find.

Since i found it, i will cherish it just like a most valuable things.

You're forever my most valuable things.

I won't sell it or let it go so easy.

For the strong determination of me, wish everything will go fine.

The Japanese guys was so KAWAII!!!!

我不知道我这么爱拍照。
每当一有照相机，我就不停的拍照直到没有了电池。=x

My side view^^
一边长，一边短。

想着我的最爱我的男人。 ；JIAN AN
FUCKING CHEEBYE E MISS HIM LOTS!
Hope to meet up as soon as possible.
As i am going to be crazy, if we still continue on of not meeting up.