'm addicted to the feeling of smoking after sometime & i love the feeling of living in the heaven ;floating in the air, whole body feel so soft. There's seems to be things been happening non-stop. No matter how i try to avoid it or to stop it, totally no use to it.

've ran 938401841984km away from Depression but 'm still being caught in the end. My window is widely open, viewing the scene outside, there's nothing nice just buildings and tiny people walking to and fro. Suddenly 've an urge of jumping down ending my life just like this ,don't care of any regrets. Just wishing to end all my problems just like this ;not caring if 'm going to become a wandering ghost. I'm totally sick & tired of everything that's happening.

Thinking back of what my Supermodel & Viviann said, it really stop me from doing it. The encouragement & no disappointment to Supermodel. The Mother Fucker Promises with Viviann flowing in my mind non-stop. They're just like my guardian angels stopping me from doing all kinds of silly things. Thanks for being with me all times but 'm sorry too of seldom meet ups now as too many things happening. I wish to be alone sometimes. I'll shall stop my Fucking Depression right now in blogging but deep inside, 'm struggling in the water ;drowning inside.

Yesterday which is Friday, never fails of skipping school at every Friday. Teachers are complaining to me of not coming to school. I went to meet my Boyfriend & we were having fun. We were slacking @ Boyfriend's house the whole day long.

He was playing his dota & I was playing with his PSP which his father just bought for him that day. Surprisingly, his father allows me to ton at his house as i think his father rather wants Boyfriend's Girlfriend which is me to accompany him than going out creating troubles around. && also Uncle was very nice that he helped me bought cigarette. =))

@ around 9pm, Natasha darling called me & we were chatting. Boyfriend was at there eavesdropping & asked me questions of me and darling conversation. Darling didn't know that i was at Boyfriend's house ;so cute of her. At around 3am, Boyfriend & I both fell asleep and suddenly Boyfriend's phone rang & was asked to go for a Dota games. && he left me at his house sleeping till he called my phone and asked me to go down meet him as he going to Candoment afterward. Auntie was so friendly and kind that she treats me eat Bee Hoon but ended up i asked Boyfriend to eat it as breakfast when we were slacking at the swimming pool there with his friend. Soon after, Boyfriend & his friend send me to the bus-stop & i went off to home.

&& Boyfriend also wants me to do well for my Mid-Year Examination. x))
'm Missing him So much currently right now.